I have always said that thinking positive thoughts and trying to find a solution to any situation was better than sulking in a stew of your own making. I’m guilty of making that depression stew, I can’t say that I’m not, but so far the things that have really thrown me into such a state has been the death of a friend, an uncle and then both of my parents in a pretty short time frame and recently, when the Drs were extremely slow in updating my thyroid meds and I felt like I was living in a dream state.
Otherwise, I really try to be upbeat and work towards fixing things instead of dwelling on the “Why me” and finding excuses.
This is not to say that I don’t worry about things. I worry too much about things, and I’m really trying to let go of what I can’t control and just be more accepting as I go along. My son told me I was too much of a push over, but I told him that I don’t feel the need to avenge myself at every turn, or that I need to fight about, and for, everything. It’s a choose your battles kind of thing.
Tomorrow, I’m going to visit my youngest. She’s moved off campus and moved into a townhouse with two friends. (She would have had to do this before next fall anyway, so I’m glad she’s getting a taste of it now.) The reason for the move? She is paying for her college by working and with academic scholarships. No handouts for that girl, she’s earning it all the way, but the room and board was too much for her this semester and although it will be close to the same amount living off campus, it’s a different payment structure that will allow her more freedom and teach her money management.
Since she got into her Athletic Training program (we are so PROUD of her!!) she now has some additional time constraints due to sports rotations, but she’s still upbeat about making everything work.
That’s why I know that tomorrow, when I take her to the hospital for a biopsy, everything will be ok. She’s had nodules growing in her thyroid for a year now and they finally decided that they had grown large enough to biopsy. They will take 5 samples tomorrow and we will know the results within 3-5 days. Hubby said that no matter what, it’ll be ok. I believe him. So positive thoughts, upbeat attitude (she’s afraid enough already, no need for Mommy to look worried) and the knowledge that no matter what, it’ll be ok, and I’m off to see my baby.